Music is a universal language, with its ability to express varying emotions and feelings.
Many who struggle expressing their feelings in words may find themselves more comfortable expressing what they feel through music. There is a phenomenon (‘emotional contagion’) that shows the relationship between perceiving an emotion and being able to induce that same emotion as a result of us relating to each other. Music also has the ability to comfort, because it has the capacity to mimic and communicate emotions forward. As a result, a strong emotional connection may be created with the artist, the music, and the audience.
I realised that my habit of compiling songs into a playlist started with the playlist I created when I was coping with my first breakup. It was comforting for me to be able to immerse myself into this little sanctuary I created, music that provided me with my safe space.
This is a sneak peek into some of the songs I have added into my playlists over the years, in which I shall explain the significance of the song for some. I have created several private playlists of songs that I had divided based on my emotions and conversations I had with friends going through similar problems:
“It’s Not The Same”, aka the breakup playlist
Songs: What Hurts The Most (Rascal Flatts), Paralyzed (NF), By Your Side (Tenth Avenue North), It’s All Downhill From Nineteen (Like The Stars), Recovery (James Arthur), Six Degrees of Separation (The Script), Drag Me Down (One Direction), Fools (Troye Sivan), Never Beyond Repair (Everfound), Unstoppable (Sia), Tell Your Heart To Beat Again (Danny Gokey).
What Hurts The Most by Rascal Flatts was at the start of my playlist. I related with the pain behind the tune and the lyrics, and I would often end up in tears during the first few times when I listened to the song. The lyric that resonated with me the most: “What hurts the most is being so close; And having so much to say, and watching you walk away”. At this stage in my life I felt that I was buried six feet under — wishing I could scream, but I couldn’t because I sold my soul to my pride and professionalism. I was adamant on showing I still won on the outside, that I was using everything in me to pull off my persona.
One of the last songs on my playlist was Tell Your Heart To Beat Again by Danny Gokey. As I progressed through my playlist, there was a clear shift in emotion from wallowing to getting back up again. The singer sings in his song: “Yesterday’s a closing door; You don’t live there anymore; Say goodbye to where you’ve been; And tell your heart to beat again”. It was an acknowledgment of how it affected me, but it was now time to get back up on to the next phase in my life.
“Standing Strong”, aka the motivational get-up-and-take-on-the-world playlist
Songs: Therapy Session (NF), Ready To Be Myself (David Dunn), Uncontainable (Set It Off), Why Worry (Set It Off), It’s Not Over Yet (for King & Country), Rise Up (Andra Day), Centuries (Fall Out Boy), Warriors (Imagine Dragons), Higher (The Score), In My Blood (Shawn Mendes), Alive (Sia), Grindin’ (NF feat. Marty), The Comeback (Danny Gokey), High Hopes (Panic! At The Disco), Meant To Live (Switchfoot).
NF was an artist I found during the depths of one of my darkest moments. Despite struggling, I was adamant to keep my mouth sealed from talking to anyone. As a result, I found myself backed into a wall, left with no solution and consumed by my fears. In one of his lyrics of Therapy Session, he sings, “How do you picture me? Want me to smile, you want me to laugh; You want me to walk in the stage with a smile on my face; When I’m mad and put on a mask, for real though”. NF talks about how he feels that nobody knows him beyond the mask he has worn for the public and references his struggle with depression as well.
Andra Day’s Rise Up clearly was a motivational anthem and thoroughly deserved the attention it received. However another song that motivated me was It’s Not Over Yet (for King & Country). The tune of the song was very upbeat, as though the artist was cheering alongside you with their music and words: “Life is a race we run; So run till the race is won; Don’t you ever give up (here we are).”
“Breathe, little brave”, aka the journey to love myself playlist
Songs: Maybe It’s Ok (We Are Messengers), Just Hold On (Steve Aoki and Louis Tomlinson), A Little Braver (New Empire), yes girl (Bea Miller), Numb (David Archuleta), Scars To Your Beautiful (Alessia Cara), Start Over (FLAME feat. NF), Mended (Matthew West), Sparrows (Jason Gray), Fix You (Coldplay), I’ll Keep On (NF ft. Jeremiah Carlson), Reckless Love (Cory Asbury), Slow Down (Danny Gokey), Bird Set Free (Sia), Invincible (David Archuleta), Dreaming With Our Eyes Open (Witt Lowry), burn the ships (for King & Country).
What does loving myself mean? Probably a concept I would still be trying to figure out till death. But till then, I found music that encouraged me to recognise the parts that made me who I am and how I should embrace them. Music reminded me of how harsh I saw myself, and how I should treat myself better just as how I was treating others.
Bea Miller’s yes girl was a song I would call as a power anthem. It was a plea that arose from an eventual realisation that the person in the situation was controlling her. It was the artist’s plea in the song that she is now standing up to reclaim what was rightfully hers: herself. She sang: “I’ve been doing what you want; But I won’t be your yes girl, no, not anymore.”
A majority of the songs in this playlist was either about saying it was okay I felt lost, or they were reminding me of my strength and how it was time to let go. burn the ships was an extremely personal song for the artist (for King & Country), as the artist had wrote the album based on his wife’s battle with addiction. She had taken the step to literally “flush the pills” — choosing to leave the past behind and step into a new day.
Dedicated-to-my-youth playlist
Songs:Youth (Troye Sivan), Youngblood (5 Seconds Of Summer), Legendary (Welshly Arms), Hall Of Fame (The Script), Forever Young (BTS), Boy With Luv (BTS).
I would call this the “fun playlist”, as I usually would be happily singing off-key to these tunes as I hopped around cheerfully. The songs in this playlist reminds me to embrace my youth and to chase my passions while I can. A lyric in Hall Of Fame (The Script) says: “You can move a mountain; You can break rocks; You can be a master; Don’t wait for luck; Dedicate yourself and you can find yourself”.
The “when I feel a little bit sassy” playlist
Songs: Boy Meets Evil (BTS), Shout Out To My Ex (Little Mix), Cypher series (BTS).
This would be the part 2 of my “fun playlist”, as these songs have the ability to make me enter into a different world: a world where I felt powerful and confident. As dark as the story behind Boy Meets Evil (BTS) may be, its message and the accompanying choreography was enticing and enthralling. The song was based loosely on author Hermann Hesse’s “Demian”, whereby a young boy grapples between good and evil.
My Christian Motivational Playlist
Songs: Just Be Held (Casting Crowns), I Will (Citizen Way), Magnify (We Are Messengers), You’re Gonna Be Ok (Bethel Music), That’s How You Change The World (Newsboys), Hope In Front Of Me (Danny Gokey), Haven’t Seen It Yet (Danny Gokey), Tremble (Bethel Music), Through All Of It (Colton Dixon), My Everything (Owl City), Even When You’re Running (Casting Crowns).
“Hold it all together; Everybody needs you strong.” The first line of Just Be Held (Casting Crowns) was something that really made my heart wrench, as it was something I tried to tell myself often in hopes to convince myself to not show what I really feel. “There’s freedom in surrender; Lay it down and let it go”. We have all at one point thought that not saying anything and just hustling through would be enough. Truth be told, we would break if we were to continue hustling without addressing what we really feel.
My BTS (K-Pop) “love yourself” playlist
Songs: Reflection, I’m Fine, Epiphany, Magic Shop, Love Myself, Two! Three!, Sea, Awake.
BTS has been on the music scene since 2013, but I have personally only discovered their music this year. These were some of the songs I picked out that addressed the need to love ourselves and the journey to get there. A lyric in Epiphany goes: “I’m the one I should love in this world; Shining me, precious soul of mine; I finally realised so I love me; Not so perfect but so beautiful; I’m the one I should love.” Although the idea of affirming love of yourself to yourself may sound strange, but it is completely needed and necessary. All too often we have disregarded how we have treated ourselves, sacrificing for those around us.
“Where there is hope, there is hardship.” I hope that you too, find your own journey through music and bask in its comfort.
